"The Saying Goes..."

February 27, 2009

"The Saying Goes..."

Well, they're not actually old sayings, but today, I was looking for quotes to put in this month's towncrier and here's some of the quotes I stumbled upon.  Some made me laugh, some made me smile, and others, just left me puzzled:

"Do not resent growing old.  Many are denied the privilege."

-anonymous

"Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art."

-Eleanor Roosevelt

"At twenty we worry about what others think of us; at forty we don't care about what others think of us; at sixty we discover they haven't been thinking about us at all."

-anonymous

"Age to me means nothing.  I can't get old; I'm working.  I was old when I was twenty-one and out of work.  As long as you're working, you stay young.  When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age."

-George Burns

Good stuff to chew on!

john.

Gone Fishing

"Gone Fishing"

Today, I was on my way down one of the halls of the building to look over an extra room (potentially, my new office? It looks more like a janitor's closet, but I'll take what I can get!) when I got stopped by one of our newer residents. He approached me and began to tell me a story about how he was helping the caregiver next to him catch some fish by the river. He inclined his head towards a direction, as if the river was down that way. I hadn't formally met him yet, so I was a little shocked because I hadn't encountered a resident who had quite the level of dementia he had in a while. It's pretty amazing though what you can find out about people with dementia though.

First of all, I'm no scientist, but I've observed that most dementia-cases seem to keep bringing up the same story. In this man's case, it was a fishing story. One would think, you could tell a story about fishing and move on, but for whatever reason, with any dementia resident we have, it's always pretty similar. There's a story, like they're waiting to get picked up, or they're trying to get home, that they just repeat over and over again. In this man's case, it's the fishing story. You'll notice though when you talk to this resident though, his voice is calm and almost soothing. Really rich and mellow, like you could fall asleep listening to him. (In a good way, not like, you're bored!) And the story he repeats seems really lively in a calm sort of way. Not full of angst or lacking resolution like other stories I've heard.

When I work with residents who are at this point in the game of life, where they don't seem "all there", it's always interesting to note what they're dwelling on. Are they talking about the love they shared between people, or is there some mysterious cliff-hanger left in their life? Do they dwell on positive thoughts of the life they've had, or are they brooding over troubling past events? Really makes you think long term and figure out how you want to live your life.

john.

Three Minutes

February 3rd, 2009

"Three Minutes"

Yesterday I was talking to one of our residents.  The conversation lasted... maybe three minutes?  At most?  She wasn't feeling well yesterday, and she looked terribly upset, so 

I offered to pray for her.  We prayed, and she looks much better today!  Lots of insight came in those three minutes though.

1_"Make your move."  She didn't say she really "needed" anything.  But the look on her face, just said she needed someone to care about her.  Not being a caregiver who could give her more meds, or a nurse who could 'officially' tell her something good about her health, we waited in silence for about 15 seconds, I, all the while, puzzled as to what I could to help her.  I was a bit nervous about it, but I went ahead and just asked her if I could pray for her.  She looked up at me, real hopeful, took my hand and said, "Yes."  It was all a little funny too because the way it played out, you would've thought she was waiting for that.  The point is, make your move.  Do something.  People need us to act and respond to their needs, and sometimes we hesitate and dawdle in fear or pretense.  And that doesn't solve anything.

2_"Hope makes the heart healthy."  I found out during the conversation and a little later, that some changes were being made to the resident's health plan, which really shouldn't be affecting her too much as far as health.  If anything, she would be feeling better... right?  I think this resident in particular though, was deeply affected by the passing of another resident fairly recently.  She would never let onto it.  She might not even realize it, but I think it really wounded her hope.  And I think wounded hope is sometimes the bigger problem with the condition of our bodies.  I think we should all some time, take time to really consider the health of our hearts.  Sometimes, we just don't realize it but bitterness, fear, and sadness have attached to us and we don't realize that our hearts are disguising those feelings.  We don't want to feel it, but then it just kind of comes out someday and then we're really shocked.  It probably wouldn't hit us quite so hard if we just checked on our heart occasionally, see how it's doing.  What that looks like practically?  Beats me.  I'm just blogging the thoughts.  I guess it could mean contemplative prayer.  Or meditating in silence (not that new-agey, stuff.  Just good solitude and thinking).  It might mean going for a detoxing run.  Just some thoughts.

Sometimes it rags down a 21-year old to work for the elderly.  Other times though, I learn so much from them, and I'm not sure I would have it any other way.

john.